Rebuilding trust after your partner cheats

Redi Tlhabi's conversation was triggered by an email she received from a woman who, five years on, is still battling to rebuild trust and intimacy with her partner who cheated.

Callers phoned in to share their own stories about infidelity and the difficulties they have faced trying to heal their relationships in the aftermath.

It is difficult, especially when you have been contacted by the other woman. it is difficult to trust. i'm not the kind of person who goes through my partner's phone, but since then, I do that.

Eliza from Johannesburg, caller

Eliza says the minute her partner leaves she starts asking herself, where is he, what's he doing and who is he with?

But she says with patience and commitment on the part of both partners, she believes after infidelity, it is possible to rebuild the relationship.

Once you've broken that trust, there's no going back, because the aggrieved partner will always want to go out there and double check and look over her shoulder all the time.

Thatelo from Kensington, Caller

Thatelo says love is not enough. Trust is key, and without it, a relationship will not work.

I am in that situation where I did break the trust, and I must say it is a tough situation. It has been two years ongoing where I am trying to rebuild the relationship...and rebuilding trust is the hardest thing you can ever do.

Abie from Johannesburg, caller

Abie says you have to be prepared to call and tell your partner where you are and who you are with all the time.

If you are cheated on, you immediately go into this defence mechanism and say how can they do this to me? But you have to look at what is going on in your relationship at the time of this affair.

Greg in Killarney, caller

Greg suggests that while you may think everything seemed fine in your relationship, something deep down may be missing. He does not condone infidelity, but he says in our complicated and busy lives, needs are not always met within relationships.

Listen to the full conversation below:

Read More
Mining job cuts on the cards, industry won't be No.1 employer again - analyst

Mining job cuts on the cards, industry won't be No.1 employer again - analyst

Labour and mining analyst predicts SA mining industry will never return to its heydey of being the largest contributor to GDP.

Trans kids need to be supported (not surpressed) by parents, says Dr Eve

Trans kids need to be supported (not surpressed) by parents, says Dr Eve

Clinical sexologist Dr Eve discusses the debate on gender diversity and the rights and agency of transgender children growing up.

#30PlusAppreciation: Lebo Mashile gives thumbs-up to redefining aging

#30PlusAppreciation: Lebo Mashile gives thumbs-up to redefining aging

Poet, actor and author Lebo Mashile speaks about how she has learned to trust herself and listen to her instincts as she ages.

Bakkie driver says woman wanted to ride at the back, slams racism accusations

Bakkie driver says woman wanted to ride at the back, slams racism accusations

Some on social media are enraged by a photo of an Eastern Cape man transporting a black woman in a cage at the back of his bakkie.

Male listeners share stories of abuse after teacher scandal

Male listeners share stories of abuse after teacher scandal

A teacher has been allegedly involved in a transactional, sexual relationship with a grade eight learner.

Must-read book titles dropping in 2017

Must-read book titles dropping in 2017

Publishers share their inside scoop on local literary works which are due to drop this year and what we can expect.

Popular articles
Brother of man who died in Kuga opens up on air, discusses lawsuit against Ford

Brother of man who died in Kuga opens up on air, discusses lawsuit against Ford

John Maytham interviews Kaveen Jimmy; who says he has damning evidence against Ford.

'My daughter bought Spur shares when she was 10 years old' - Dr Adrian Saville

'My daughter bought Spur shares when she was 10 years old' - Dr Adrian Saville

What does Citadel’s famed disciple of contrarian, deep-value investing Dr Adrian Saville hope for (and fear) about money?

‘3 richest South Africans have wealth equal to the poorest 28 million’ – Oxfam

‘3 richest South Africans have wealth equal to the poorest 28 million’ – Oxfam

The Free Market Foundation's Leon Louw, however, calls Oxfam "OxScam" and says the organisation does not care about poor people.

It's not the end of the road... Top tips to improve your matric

It's not the end of the road... Top tips to improve your matric

"Recognise that it’s not the end, it’s the beginning." Expert advise for school-leavers who want to improve their results.

NSFAS to reopen 2017 applications

NSFAS to reopen 2017 applications

National Student Financial Aid Scheme says it will reopen 2017 loan applications after receiving requests for deadline extension.

Right now, these are the best shares to buy on the JSE (according to Adviceworx)

Right now, these are the best shares to buy on the JSE (according to Adviceworx)

Bruce Whitfield interviews a Portfolio Manager about what she believes are the hottest stocks right now.

They couldn’t fix his iPod, so he did it himself (thereby creating iFix)

They couldn’t fix his iPod, so he did it himself (thereby creating iFix)

Alex Fourie created iFix in 2006 from his dorm room at university. Today it repairs about 10 000 devices a month.

5 ways the NSFAS funding model will change in 2017

5 ways the NSFAS funding model will change in 2017

The National Student Financial Aid Scheme (NSFAS) will pilot a new funding model in 2017. NSFAS chairperson Sizwe Nxasana explains.