Obsession with perfectionism not good - Dr Schomer

We all want the end results of what we do to be perfect, a perfect marriage, a perfect work project, a perfect house etc. But do we ever stop and realise that our idea of perfection, meaning, no flaws, no issues, and no problems actually makes us imperfect.

According to Dr Schomer perfection is the rule of ‘should’, I should be self-reliant, I should be perfect, I should never fail etc. We all have it but everyone needs to know when to turn it off and let it go, says Dr Schomer.

Perfectionists have two fears that drive them to be perfect all the time:

  • The fear that people won’t like you
  • The fear of being embarrassed

Perfection depends on the tasks

There are certain tasks that leave room for mistakes like sweeping the streets or washing dishes. But a doctor or a pilot cannot make mistakes because they dealing with human lives and Dr Schomer say ‘find the balance’

External perfectionists and internal perfectionist

External perfectionist - constantly find faults in what others do, they hold very high standards and they are never satisfied unless they do it themselves.
Internal perfectionists - they have very excessive demanding expectations on themselves

Zandile in Midrand says she was married to a perfectionist for nine years. She says her ex-husband wanted things to be done his way and that nothing was ever good enough for him. They ended up getting a divorce.

Nick in Craighall says obsession with perfection could lead to self-destruction. He is recovering from drugs addiction because he wanted everything perfect and when things were not perfect he resorted to drugs.

Here are some of the tweets on perfectionism

Perfectionism test The goal of this perfectionism test is to determine whether you have perfectionistic tendencies, to what degree, and in which areas of your life.


Recommended

by NEWSROOM AI
Read More
Eskom and unions still locked in talks over wage increase

Eskom and unions still locked in talks over wage increase

Eskom is offering 7.5% while the unions are demanding 8% for this year and 8.5% for the next two years.

President Ramaphosa to meet with Obama ahead of Mandela Annual Lecture

President Ramaphosa to meet with Obama ahead of Mandela Annual Lecture

Dignitaries are streaming into Wanderers Stadium in Johannesburg for Mandela Annual Lecture where Obama is the keynote speaker.

'Madiba was a Pan-African leader, a man of his time'

'Madiba was a Pan-African leader, a man of his time'

Just a day before Madiba's birthday Obenewa Amponsah looks at his life and his connections within the African continent.

Failure is a must - Dr Schomer

Failure is a must - Dr Schomer

Dr Helgo Schomer gives tips on how to bounce back and overcome failure whether big or small.

5 tips to make blended families work

5 tips to make blended families work

Dr Schomer gives some guidelines to help blended families work out their growing pains and live together successfully.

How to raise smart children

How to raise smart children

Dr Schomer's tips on raising children with different talents and characters, and how to encourage their uniqueness.

Popular articles
Robots are already replacing financial advisors right here in South Africa

Robots are already replacing financial advisors right here in South Africa

But can they be trusted? Are they independent? Bruce Whitfield interviews Personal Financial Advisor Warren Ingram.

Madiba’s private secretary Zelda la Grange opens up about money (hers and his)

Madiba’s private secretary Zelda la Grange opens up about money (hers and his)

Bruce Whitfield interviews La Grange about her and Madiba's attitude to money (hopes and fears, successes and failures, etc.)

You’re either a ‘money slave’ or a ‘money master’ (says author of 'My Money')

You’re either a ‘money slave’ or a ‘money master’ (says author of 'My Money')

The Money Show’s Bruce Whitfield interviews Sugar Creek financial expert and author of “My Money” Gerald Mwandiambira.

How to make money through ‘buy-to-let’ (using very little of your own money)

How to make money through ‘buy-to-let’ (using very little of your own money)

Bruce Whitfield interviews Francois Janse van Rensburg, author of “Making Money through Buy-To-Let in South Africa".

Retirement: 8 biggest mistakes people typically make…

Retirement: 8 biggest mistakes people typically make…

The Money Show’s Bruce Whitfield interviews Galileo Capital Financial Advisor Warren Ingram.

UPDATE: Chilling WhatsApp from Marli van Breda's ex-boyfriend read out in court

UPDATE: Chilling WhatsApp from Marli van Breda's ex-boyfriend read out in court

Marli van Breda's ex took the stand in the trial of triple murder accused Henri van Breda.

3 easy questions could bag you R2000!

3 easy questions could bag you R2000!

WIN R2000! But only if you can prove you're a whiz of the MTN Biz Quiz by answering the following three questions...

Meet Errol Musk - father of Elon, the most innovative entrepreneur of our age

Meet Errol Musk - father of Elon, the most innovative entrepreneur of our age

Elon Musk, as you’d expect, hails from an exceptional family. Bruce Whitfield interviews his Capetonian father.