Holding your centre when things fall apart in the time of COVID-19
COVID-19 has had most families battle with the fear or the actual loss of loved ones because of the 21 day lockdown.
In some instances families have been unable to stay at the bed side of patients and see them off.
Azania Mosaka spoke to the founders of Love Legacy Dignity - Helena Donly and Ngiphiwe (Mapi) Mhlangu, who provided guidance on the the life-affirming conversations we should have in light of the mortality and how to grieve or stay centred through this time.
What is being taken away is all of the structures that support us at a time of grief - that people pay their respects, people pray together, that there is a lot of event organising to come together to remember this person...Helena Donly, Love Legacy Dignity - Co-founder
Sometimes to the meditation place I go to in Houghton, they have a meditation which is all over the world at the same time and I am wondering what we can do with our relatives to say every evening at 7 o'clock when we would have been saying the evening prayers, can we know that we are all stopping what we are doing in our homes and that we are saying our prayers and lighting a candle....Helena Donly, Love Legacy Dignity - Co-founder
What we know when a person passes is all being taken away ... suddenly what we hold dear when someone passes, the things we want do we can't do, we need to learn new ways and that learning new ways is what Helena suggested. We will sing a hymn, send family voice messages.Ngiphiwe (Mapi) Mhlangu, Love Legacy Dignity - Co-founder
Mhlangu says at this time, we should be taking stock of the state of our relationships.
Are there any relationships out there that we need to repair or we need to release? Start thinking about if you were to be collected by the doctors now because something is wrong with you. You must be aware that no one will be with you in hospital. Are there any conversations that you think are important and you should have with a loved one?Ngiphiwe (Mapi) Mhlangu, Love Legacy Dignity - Co-founder
Although tedious, Donly suggests a checklist that you should go through in case you pass on.
The checklist is very tedious, it is the gift to your loved ones so that they have all of the things that they need if you go - you passwords, where your documents are, what the debit orders are, that that is all set out.Ngiphiwe (Mapi) Mhlangu, Love Legacy Dignity - Co-founder
Click on the link below to hear the full conversation...
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